These are seven ways that have worked for me during my eight-year marriage. Read on; you might just find something that you have not tried.
- Respect your partner: By respect I mean respect him as well as his privacy. When the bible says that the two of you will become one, it did not mean the private message on his cellphone is also yours. Do not treat your husband like you would treat your child. He already has a mother, he does not need a second one.
- Listen to your partner: Listen when your partner has something to say. We, as women, talk too damn much sometimes. And our husbands think that they are fixers. They are always ready to fix things. Sometimes we just need to listen to each other. It’s okay if you don’t have a solution to the problem. You’ve already done a lot by listening.
- Communicate with your partner: Communication is key in any relationship. Don’t assume that the other person knows what you are thinking about. Instead of complaining about all the things that your partner is doing wrong, talk to him and ask him for exactly what you want out of the marriage.
- Compromise in every situation: If you love black and your husband loves white, compromise on getting gray. We need to meet each other in the middle. We are two different individuals working toward one mutual goal, which is having a successful marriage.
- Put yourself in your partner’s shoes: Treat your partner the way you want to be treated. Don’t be quick to judge. If it’s okay for you to have male friends, why shouldn’t it be okay for him to have female friends?
- Support your partner: Be the supportive wife that God create you to be by being there for your man. Back him up in every situation, good or bad.
- Love your partner: Love should have been number one on my list, but I put it down here to show you that love covers everything that I just said above. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” Love is not the butterflies you feel in your guts when everything is going well in the marriage. Love is what is left after all these butterflies are gone. I sound like I am quoting somebody. I probably am, but I forgot who said it. Love is what gives you courage to forgive your husband after he cheated on you. So next time you say you love somebody, go back to 1 Corinthians 13 to find out if you really love that person.